Detection/ Diagnosis:

My father always used to feel feverish, though the thermometer was unable to detect his body temperature. Gradually, we observed that he was experiencing a high fever continuously. After consulting with various doctors, we found out that he had cancer as well as Tuberculosis (TB). My father was 69 years old when he received the diagnosis. In December 2020, we discovered that he had stage 4 Non-Hodgkin lymphoma (NHL). This cancer starts in the lymphatic system, where the body produces too many abnormal lymphocytes, a type of white blood cell.

Journey:

In the beginning, my father used to experience regular episodes of fever. He felt feverish, but the thermometer was unable to detect any temperature. We decided to visit the doctor. Initially, normal antibiotics were prescribed to address the fever, as there were no signs of high fever. Only normal weakness and internal shivering were the symptoms.

After a month of treatment, we began to observe symptoms of high fever. We informed the physician about the situation, as my father was experiencing a rise in temperature. The physician prescribed medication for high fever and weakness. Following this, he recommended various tests. However, as the days passed, the fever continued to escalate. Concerned about the situation, we sought a second opinion from another doctor. It was during this consultation that we learned of the actual diagnosis. We questioned the doctor about why the fever persisted and why it kept recurring. We had numerous inquiries. The doctor carefully reviewed every report and conducted an examination. Subsequently, he advised that my father undergo a biopsy for a definitive conclusion. Biopsy results revealed Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma. 

We then sought treatment at a hospital in Kolkata. There, the doctors conducted further tests and confirmed the earlier diagnosis of cancer. They informed us that my father was in stage 4, and the variant was particularly aggressive (B Variant). We discussed the case with the medical team, inquiring about the potential survival rates and the available treatment options. They explained that given the advanced stage of cancer and the aggressive nature of the variant, it was challenging to predict a 100% chance of survival, but they assured us they would do their utmost. They also suggested seeking a second opinion, emphasizing the uncertainty surrounding the prognosis. Following our discussions with the doctors, we began to reconsider our options. We were provided with detailed information about the extent of cancer spread throughout the body. Despite the associated risks, we decided to proceed with chemotherapy sessions. The doctors cautioned us about potential side effects, and due to the widespread nature of the cancer, a bone marrow transplant was deemed unfeasible. Despite the uncertainties, we opted to undergo chemotherapy.

The 1st chemo cycle went well. He was given antibiotics before. There were a total of 6 chemo cycles that were to be performed. Each session was to be taken every 22 days. There were side effects of chemotherapy treatment like hair loss, and weakness. We did not mention cancer to our father even once. He knew that he is being treated and the situation is serious. He did not know that cancer is causing all the problems. After the chemo cycle, he did not have any temperature. We were happy as it was a positive sign. In between, we noticed that the WBCs were going down. We informed the doctor about the same. He said that it will vary because of the treatment. The second chemo went well like the 1st one with the same dullness. The doctor recommended intaking a protein diet to get rid of the weakness. My father had mood swings during the journey. He was not getting any taste from the food due to the chemotherapy effects. Somehow all these things were taken care of. 

Before the 3rd chemo, we observed high fever, indigestion, and diarrhea. The doctor gave medicines as per the situation. We asked the doctor if we could travel to our native place as papa was feeling bored at the same place and we did. My father started feeling feverish and we informed the doctor. He prescribed some medicines for the same. At the end of the 3rd cycle, the doctor told us to get some scans. After seeing the reports, doctors said the spread has reduced. It was a good sign. Doctors observed dark spots in the liver. They did the tests again. Biopsy results were negative and they were unable to find out the reason behind the dark spots. Doctors said he is having Tuberculosis(TB) and they gave him the drugs for TB. It was hard for us to digest the news. The temperature kept on rising and stopped only when the drugs were given. After the medicine effects were over, the temperature rose. We saw too much dullness and health downfall. As my father was only getting the antibiotic treatment we asked the doctor if we could take him home and give the antibiotic home. The doctors agreed.

We took dad home and noticed that the antibiotics were not working. They were useless. We again shifted him back to the hospital. The doctor said he is having some breathing issues. They moved my dad to a ventilator. We agreed but we questioned the doctor about how the situation went out of control after prescribing the right drugs. The doctors had no answer. They kept on saying we are doing everything we can. 

At that moment we were not able to do anything, we could not rush to another hospital. Even if we would have rushed, that will be waste of time as they will do the testing again and the results will take a lot of time and we were not in a situation to risk anymore. The pandemic has also started. Because of all these issues, we agreed on keeping our father on ventilation. In 24 hours he passed away. In the whole journey, he didn't know that he was suffering from cancer. We never disclosed the term cancer in front of him. 

Thoughts about side treatment:

Some of our friends and family members had the belief that we should have gone for Ayurvedic treatment. we thought of going for Ayurveda treatment after the 3rd cycle of chemotherapy but we did not get the chance as my father already passed away. 

Revealing the news:

Everyone in our family was aware that my father was getting treated. when the doctor informed us that they have to shift him to the ventilator, we understood that now the situation has become very serious. Therefore, we called everyone and apprised them that the situation has become very serious and the doctors are shifting him to the ventilator. With the word ventilation itself, people understood that either he will make it or hell pass away. 

We all knew that the survival chances were very less. We were mentally stressed but at the same time, we were preparing ourselves for any bad news. My father was in a critical stage. After putting him on the ventilation in 24 hours he passed away. The next morning we had to inform everyone about the situation. 

My Lifestyle: 

My lifestyle had a drastic change from the day my father was diagnosed with cancer. Many changes happened during and after the treatment. I work in an IT Company. I had to take care of my job and my father at the same time as I cannot take the risk of losing my job. I did not want to be financially weak as well. 

Managing my professional life with my personal life was a task in the beginning. I used to give him baths, feed him, and used to take him for a walk in the morning. Since he got diagnosed, I was focusing only on two things in my life, my work, and taking care of my father. After he passed away in March, I was emotional, my life changed completely, but we all have to move on with our life. 

Journey as a Caregiver:

A caregiver provides assistance to those who require help with daily tasks. The life of a caregiver can be exceedingly challenging at times. I experienced moments of worry and uncertainty, particularly regarding the treatment my father was receiving in the hospital. As a caregiver, my lifestyle underwent a significant transformation. Despite encountering difficulties, I was fortunate to have unwavering support from my family. Their care and concern were invaluable to me during this time. Additionally, I received financial assistance from my brother and sister when I faced setbacks in my own life. Together, the three of us faced and overcame these challenges.

Obstacles:

My father was treated in a private hospital and private hospitals can be expensive at times. We faced few financial problems but we managed them somehow and moved on with the journey. My whole family supported us in this journey. Me, My elder brother and sister, all came together and supported my father and fought the battle with him. 

Parting Message:

The only parting message I want to give to all the caregivers, survivors, and the people who are going through this battle is to stay motivated. Do not lose hope. Just keep telling yourself even in the worst situation that you can surpass this and become a winner. Staying motivated will help you a lot while going through anything in life as you start believing in the power of positivity.

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